Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
