I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
