How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
