i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
my being single is dangerous.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
