So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
