I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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