dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
We need to get me chipped asap
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize