If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
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