This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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