I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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