she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Randomize
