They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize