She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
