I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
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