there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
