so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
