I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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