he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
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His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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