That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
