I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
