Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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