This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Randomize
