Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Come see our sink grown plant.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
