It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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