Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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