The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
