my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Randomize
