My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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