he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
