Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I'm too high and old for this...
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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