oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
