First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
