Texts From Last Night

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  (786): View more from Florida

  if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass

  (352): View more from Florida

  godspeed.

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  (786): if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass (352): godspeed. http://tfl.nu/ecel
  Replies (14) Good night (5117) Bad night (608)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking

  (1-541): View more from Oregon

  only in oregon

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  (541): at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking (1-541): only in oregon http://tfl.nu/1bea
  Replies (156) Good night (7510) Bad night (1045)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Farmville is her only friend.

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  (847): Farmville is her only friend. http://tfl.nu/6s8i
  Replies (55) Good night (859) Bad night (5672)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?

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  (443): hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"? http://tfl.nu/cmo1
  Replies (23) Good night (1326) Bad night (5494)
• Favorite

  (862): View more from New Jersey

  this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming

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  (862): this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming http://tfl.nu/d5m0
  Replies (34) Good night (4097) Bad night (950)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework

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  (313): sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework http://tfl.nu/3cov
  Replies (12) Good night (5034) Bad night (882)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.

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  (513): I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY. http://tfl.nu/5vxl
  Replies (7) Good night (2967) Bad night (1038)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks

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  (207): She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks http://tfl.nu/sgso
  Replies (22) Good night (5263) Bad night (1138)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.

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  (727): let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man. http://tfl.nu/iiq1
  Replies (5) Good night (1710) Bad night (597)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."

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  (618): Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you." http://tfl.nu/wg5q
  Replies (9) Good night (1635) Bad night (1797)
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me

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  (504): i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me http://tfl.nu/qsky
  Replies (9) Good night (2155) Bad night (618)
• Favorite

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.

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  (507): We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom. http://tfl.nu/ilht
  Replies (7) Good night (1869) Bad night (564)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?

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  (774): Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is? http://tfl.nu/utv4
  Replies (7) Good night (1325) Bad night (372)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect

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  (518): I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect http://tfl.nu/1a0b
  Replies (3) Good night (264) Bad night (476)
• Favorite

  (219): View more from Indiana

  You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.

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  (219): You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp. http://tfl.nu/j9dr
  Replies (2) Good night (415) Bad night (132)

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