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• (630): View more from Illinois

  he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"

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• (914): View more from New York

  I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.

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• (319): View more from Iowa

  Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??

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• (716): View more from New York

  I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

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• (713): View more from Texas

  You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that

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• (206): View more from Washington

  I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..

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• (434): View more from Virginia

  The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me

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• (952): View more from Minnesota

  How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?

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