I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
