Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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