C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
