is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
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