i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
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