a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
