just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
This is classic penis vs brain.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
