I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
He shit in the fireplace
Randomize
