Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize