I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
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i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
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Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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