ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
