Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
