My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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