You did not just play the dead husband card again.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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