Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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