i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Randomize
