I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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