I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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