I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
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I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
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I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I would fuck him just for his dog
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